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Thursday, June 9, 2011

COMPARING APPLES TO ORANGES?



PRESS HERE TO READ "WHAT IF REP. WEINER WERE FATHER WEINER?" (Of course, I'd change my name!)

I don't think this comparison is fair. I fully embrace our Judeo-Christian sexual ethic and deplore Rep. Weiner's actions. Most of all I sympathize with him over his sexual addiction. Without really knowing him or his situation, it is clear that he is addicted to sex and the computer is his near occasion of sin, like the corner liquor store is for the alcoholic.

Congressmen make no promise to celibacy and their persona is not built upon sexual chastity even in marriage. The Catholic priest's idenity as such is founded upon his promises to celibacy and obedience. Although, unless we forget, married couples make vows to "exclusivity" in a public forum and this is no different and perhaps even weightier than the promise to celibacy that priests make at their ordination.

Nonetheless, when a priest is accused of sexual impropriety, he is in fact sinning against his very vocation and the laity have a right to a higher degree of accountability in this regard than they would toward the congressman.

But let's talk about addiction, sexual and otherwise.

I'm old enough to remember a time when alcoholics were treated as pariah. They were considered weak; they were abusive to their wives, children and friends and they were considered a scandal to the family and community. They were shunned; most lived their alcoholism in the closet.

But somewhere around the late 1960's and early 70's, AA and other organizations as well as medical science began to label alcoholism as a disease not a personal weakness, a disease that could be brought into remission especially through 12 step programs such as AA or even through various therapies and medication.

Today our attitude about alcoholism is very different. We see it as a disease, an addiction. People who are in recovery wear their sobriety as a badge of honor and are happy to call themselves "recovering" alcoholics.

Around the same time, late 1960's and early 1970's a move to treat those with sexual addictions as we treat those with drinking and drug addictions was also occurring. Guess who was at the forefront of this social engineering? The Bishops of the Catholic Church and the psychiatrists and psychologists who advised them.

Yes, we all know by now that priests who have promised celibacy just like congressmen and presidents who have vowed fidelity in marriage can suffer from sexual addictions which manifest in different ways. A priest was just arrested in Florida for soliciting oral sex from an uncover officer at a beach known for this type of activity. Some have addictions to pornography that they access on the internet or do what Rep Weiner did in terms of on-line sexual communications.

Others of course abuse teenagers and prepubescent children. Of course in these cases, the children and teenagers are unsuspecting victims of these sexually addicted adults who are scarred for life in many cases, especially if the person abusing is a respected figure, like a parent, a priest, a teacher or even a U.S. Representative. For a priest, though, the victimization is made worse because the priest represents God.

But there was a move in the Church and in society to treat sex offenders with true addictions as we would treat alcoholics. They were placed in recovery programs, treated with therapy and medication and expected to be an a 12 step program of continuing recovery. The hope was that just like with alcoholics, recovering sex addicts could wear their recovery as a badge of honor and be reintegrated into society and their professions.

In the 1980's I knew of bishops in some dioceses that returned priests who had sex with minors and went through therapy and recovery programs back to parish ministry and told the congregations of the priest's addiction and his recovery program. There was transparency. And like the alcoholic priest who is returned to ministry, everyone knows it and is prayerfully supportive of the priest's on-going recovery.

Alcoholics, keep in mind, in their drunken stupors hurt not just themselves but their families, sometimes scarring their spouses and children for life.

Today, with zero tolerance for sexual addictions especially those directed toward children and teenagers, every sexual addict is treated the same by the Church--they are humiliated, treated as pariah, shunned, castigated, mocked and marginalized, the same thing that the media and others are doing to Rep. Weiner.

What should the Church and our society at large do? Join the pummeling with great gusto to save face or to call the people of God and others of good will to Christian love and charity, not just for the abused who should always come first, but for the abuser who is addicted and thus suffering from a disease,not just a personal, moral weakness?

8 comments:

Seeker said...

there but for the Grace of God go I...

Anonymous said...

Firstly, Church officials should worship Truth rather than worshiping, or appearing to worship, the idol of political correctness. Gay activists are very effectively transforming our culture into one that accepts not only the homosexual but also accepts and rationalizes deviant, disordered homosexual acts. Church officials should not sacrifice Truth to propaganda or use the John Jay propaganda for short term advantage. Even though all are sinners, heterosexuality is normal and normative while homosexuality is deviant. Illness or not, it is not prudent to admit homosexual men to seminaries.
Kleptomania is an illness. Would prudent merchants hire them? Should we expect them to? Priests, who are called “Father,” should have a healthy appreciation of and dedication to genuine fatherhood for their spiritual children, regardless of age or gender.
Dr. Richard Fitzgibbons, as a psychiatrist, is more qualified than the criminologists at John Jay to interpret the data in their report. To see some comments by this qualified professional, go to: http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/utiles/myprint/print.php
Among other things, he said: “One can conclude that these priests have strong same-sex attraction,” he said. “When an adult is involved with homosexual behavior with an adolescent male, he clearly has a major problem in the area of homosexuality.” “analysis of the research demonstrates clearly that the major cause of the crisis was the homosexual abuse of males.”
“If the (U.S. bishops) conference wanted an analysis of the causes of complex sexual behavior with adolescents,” he said, “don't turn to criminologists.”
“They are not trained to understand those causes – that training is given to mental health professionals.”
“They can report on the statistical analysis of the behavior but in terms of causes, they've crossed a line, in my view.”
Has the USCCB officially adopted the John Jay Report and its conclusions? If so, they are in danger of perpetuating the scandalous behavior. They need to adopt the conclusions of competent Catholic medical professionals.
Every seminary applicant and student should be required to take HIV-aids tests at least annually, and Priests should be required to do the same.

Anonymous said...

Too bad he didn't post photos wearing his phylactery rather than his briefs.

This could be the continuation of a long lesson for everyone. Weiner did wrong and knew it. He seemed to hope people who raised him on lax attitudes toward right and wrong would be there to back him up. Too bad that before he crossed the line he did not get the chance to ask one of the many priests who found out how much support you get from the people who tell you right and wrong are shades of gray.

So maybe people of good will can help him find his centre. I am afraid that his wife will be his lanyard to relativism rather than his ground.

Unfortunately, he will probably find the kind of forgiveness that is based on short, weary memories.

rcg

Gene said...

Seeker, I do not understand your comment. Do you have to constantly fight the urge to send pics of yourself in your drawers on the internet? Do you require the intervention of grace to keep you from such juvenile and disgraceful behavior? Please clarify...

Seeker said...

Pin, Lets see if I can help you? Since you like to make things personal, and probably to your liking I do too by my post, I do know a thing or two about compulsive behavior. No I do not have any urges as you so aptly describe. But I do have a condition in which I rely completely on the Grace of God. Oh, I do the footwork hopefully in accordance but the results I consider God's will for me as I struggle with this condition. Also, I really don't "require" anything from God. Gods Grace is a gift and will suffice. Any that is sent my way I will relish. Sometimes I just don't realize how much God is offering. This is where I and a lot of other people fail who are shut off from this wonderful gift. We don't accept it because the sin in our lives blotches Gods merciful gift.
I usually agree and enjoy your comments as I consider myself a revert and a traditionalist to the Faith but sometimes I think you should just chill. But it won't stop me from "laughing out loud" at some of your more poignant posts. Ignotus comes to mind. Keep up the good work and please pray for me as I will you.

Gene said...

Seeker, forgive me. You sounded like you were saying that all of us are like that and we need the constant intervention of God's grace to keep us from doing such stuff. It sounded like, "Well, there is no diffference other than degree between anyone. So, there is only a quantitative difference between Weiner and the Pope or you and me and Charles Manson." I guess I have my lib detector working too much. Thanks for the response. Gene

Seeker said...

You know, I really like you Pinan. You are my kind of guy. Sorry to get a little mushy here but I have one of those lib detectors too. Thanks for keeping me on my toes. I can see how my post was misconstrued. It was a little general especially since I was quoting one of those heretical Church of England protestants. We all need accountability. Have a great day.

Gene said...

Now see, Seeker, you go a-whoring after the Church of England and suddenly no one understands you anymore! I did, however, enjoy the royal wedding and those two Middleton girls... *Christ have Mercy*